


Finding my Reason to Live

by BlackIsMyColor73



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Adventure, Age Difference, Alternate Universe, Angst, Depression, Drug Use, Eventual Smut, F/F, Family Drama, Fluff, Magic, Romance, Sneaking Out, Swan Queen - Freeform, Swan Queen endgame, Teenage Rebellion
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-13
Updated: 2018-10-07
Packaged: 2019-07-11 16:19:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15975968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackIsMyColor73/pseuds/BlackIsMyColor73
Summary: Regina never cast her curse so Emma grows up in the Enchanted Forest. After Reginas failure at casting the curse she falls into a deep depression and begins druging herself with a watered down sleeping curse she receives from Maleficent. She comes to an agreement with the Charmings that she will leave them alone if they agree to never leave their castle. Emma grows up and gets tired of being trapped in the castle and being smothered by her parents. When Emma becomes a teenager (17) she begins to sneak out of the castle and one night runs into Regina. Her darkness entrances Emma and she begins to sneak out on a regular basis to meet with the Queen. Emma is enticed by her dark magic and Regina agrees to teach Emma magic. Teaching Emma magic brings Regina out of her depression and allows Emma to be free to be the person she wants. Little do they both know they will fall in love with each other.





	1. Sneaking out

**Author's Note:**

> Rating subject to change!

The Evil Queen's Castle

Regina sits on a chair in her room, needle in hand and a vacant expression on her face. As she pokes her finger with a watered down draft of a sleeping curse, she nods into a dreamlike state. She tries to forget the past. Forget that she killed her father, her failure at casting the dark curse and not being able to get her revenge on Snow White. This opiate like drug helps her to not feel pain and sadness but it also blocks out joy and happiness. She lives in a state of perpetual numbness, secretly hoping that one day the needle will put her to sleep for good. She has fired most of her guard since there was really no need for them now that Snow was locked in a castle of her own. She has never felt so lonely. The genie in the mirror occasionally tries to communicate with her but he has grown tired of her self-pity. The only company she keeps is her dear old friend Maleficent, whom she visits when she needs more of her drug. She has the capability to make more but Maleficent is also drugging herself and well, misery loves company. So she sits in her dank and gloomy castle alone finding no purpose in life. Not only has she given up on life but her appearance as well. She has found no need for her evil attire anymore so instead wears a simple black lose fitting dress. Her once long and shiny hair is now tangled and matted. She doesn’t see a point in wearing makeup when there is no one to intimidate and nowadays she hates to look in the mirror and at the failure she believes she has become. 

The Charming’s Castle

“Emma! Time for Dinner,” Snow yells up the spiral staircase leading to Emma’s bedroom.  
“Coming,” She responds. The young blond puts down her book and runs down the staircase and her nose is greeted by the smell of roasted pig and freshly baked bread. She sits down across from her parents at their extremely large dining room table.  
“So Emma, how was your day?” David asks.  
“Boring, as always. Just like yesterday and the day before that and the month before that and the year…”  
“We get the idea, Emma.” Snow interrupted. “You know why we can’t leave the castle.”  
“Yeah, yeah. The Evil Queen promised not to kill us so long as we stay in the castle, blah blah. If I could at least go for a walk, I wouldn’t go far. The queen won’t even notice.”  
“The Queen has eyes everywhere, it’s too much of a risk.” Snow says shaking her head unaware that the Queen is most likely sedated.  
“I can’t live my entire life trapped in this castle! I want to have friends and go on adventures like you guys use to.”  
“Don’t think of it as being trapped Emma. The most important thing is that we are all together,” she says taking a hold of David’s hand. “If the Queen would have succeeded with her curse we would all be separated.”  
“Well at least I would have friends!” Emma says almost yelling.  
“You don’t mean that Emma.” David chimes in.  
“I do! I can’t take this anymore. I’ve read every book in the library. None of our servants are my age and I’ve outgrown all my toys. I’m 17! I should be getting courted by a handsome man or beautiful women at this age.”  
“Women?” David says as he drops his fork full of meat.  
“Yeah dad, how am I supposed to know what I like if I’ve never been around either gender my age,” She responds folding her arms.  
“The Queen’s punishment may come to pass Emma and then we can find you a loving husband but for now we are safe and we are together. Can we please just enjoy our dinner,” Snow responds.  
Emma spends the rest of dinner plotting ways that she can sneak out of the castle. I can’t go out the front door, she thinks silently to herself. My window is too high up, the garden gate is too squeaky and the balcony connects to my parents. Then she remembers there is a door in the servant’s quarters that leads outside to where they hang the laundry. Perfect, this will work, she smiles to herself.  
After everyone retires to their bedroom, Emma anxiously awaits for her parents to fall asleep so she can enact her plan. She stands patiently by her door holding a candle, her shoes already on and readily draped in a dark purple cloak. After an hour she silently opens her bedroom door and listens to make sure there is no noise. After five minutes of dead silence she slithers out of her barely opened door and begins her journey to the basement. She walks on her tiptoes and freezes every time she hears the smallest sound. This is the riskiest thing she has ever done and the butterflies in her stomach feel like they are about to fly out her throat. Once she gets to the servants quarters she hears voices coming from their rooms but all the doors are shut. She blows out her candle so they won’t see the fire’s glare looming under the cracks of their doors and slowly makes her way to the exit. She hears footsteps approaching one of the closed doors and knows, it’s now or never.  
She quietly opens the door and enters outside into the unknown. She lets out an exhale or relief not realizing she had been holding her breath. She starts walking through the sheets that are pinned up on the laundry line and takes in all the scents of the great outdoors. She ventures on in the dark uncharted land wishing she had brought a match to relight her candle. She sets the candle down realizing it will serve her no further purpose. The excitement of being outside the castle outweighs her fear of being alone in the dark. She decides to go to the stables to see the horses that she always hears whinnying out her bedroom window. As she enters the barn, the horses start to snort and buck, sensing an unknown figure entering their home. She approaches one of them and successful calms it by gently petting its nose, the others begin to settle down as well. She grabs a handful of hay and feeds it to the horse she just became acquainted with. She decides to name the horse Rebel in honor of her rebellious evening. She speaks to the horse in a whisper while continuing to pet him.  
“You probably feel just as trapped as I do, huh, Rebel? I think we both need to get outside of this castle. I wish I knew how to ride you but I promise I will figure it out and on another dark night we shall venture on.” Emma gently kisses the horse and exits the stables.  
She decides to take a walk to the other side of the castle to the gardens she has dreamt of running through. She hops over the side gate fearful that it might be too squeaky to open and she is instantly greeted but the marvelous smell of roses. She carefully bends down a limb and plants her nose in a luscious white rose, slowly taking in the intoxicating scent. The high-spirited teenager decides to run, just like in her dreams. She takes off gliding down the narrow path as she smiles she realizes this is the happiest she had been in a long time. As her feet skate by the alyssum and lysimachia, her hands glide over the lilac and hydrangeas bushes. Her nose is welcoming the scent of peonies and lavender and her eyes are overwhelmed with botanical beauty. Even though it is dark, the moon illuminates the enchanted world around her. The now out of breath Emma decides she shall probably head back inside. She heads back to the servants quarters with a head full of wonder and a heart full of joy.  
She makes it safely back to her room without getting caught. Her adrenalin is pumping so fast that there is no way she can go to sleep now. She decides to sneak to the library and find books about horse-riding so on her next night of adventure, her and Rebel can go beyond the castle boundaries.


	2. The Stables

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Queen goes to the Forbidden Fortress to get more of the sleeping curse from Maleficent. Emma's parents decide to let her go to the stables with a servant women.

The Evil Queen’s Castle/Forbidden Fortress

Regina wakes from her slumber in a fog and immediately reaches for her needle and drug. The bottle is nearly empty and a rush of panic goes down her spine. She calls out to one of the few member of her guard, “prepare the carriage, we are going to the forbidden fortress,” she says with much less malice than she did when she was going to retrieve the dark curse. Regina pokes her finger with what’s left of the sleeping draft, poofs on some make up and tighter fitting black dress and heads down to the carriage. Regina spends the entire ride going between being asleep and half awake. Regina arrives at the Forbidden Fortress excited to see Maleficent. She enters a side door that is always unlocked and makes her way up to the room she knows Maleficent will be sitting, poking herself.  
“Regina, darling, is that you dear?” The frazzled hair women asks as she is removing the needle from her finger.  
“Maleficent. Looking pitiful as usual.” The queen says stepping into Maleficent’s view.  
“Take a look in the mirror dear.” She responds.  
“Touché.”  
Both being starved for attention, Maleficent and Regina’s relationship has become more than a just a friendship. They both know is wasn’t love but both enjoyed having someone to hold. The queen walks over to the couch where she is sitting and sits down close to her. Regina places her hand on the dragon’s thigh and tells her, “I need more.”  
“Of course you do dear, why else would you be here?” Maleficent says looking at Regina through barely opened eyes. “Thirsty for a poke?” She asks taking a hold of Regina’s hand, their faces now less than an inch apart, “This batch is a little stronger than the last.”  
“Like you said, dear, why else would I be here?” The brunette answers before she leans in for a slow, unmotivated kiss. Unfortunately both women are always too drugged up to do anything more than kiss but to them, that’s all the affection they need. Maleficent breaks up the kiss not soon after it started and reaches for her vile and a new sharp needle. She places her hand on the queen’s cheek and slowly moves it down her neck, between her breast and to her hand. She dips the needle in her potion and pricks Regina’s finger and then her own. Regina instantly feels relief as she slowly nods her head back entering into oblivion. 

The Charming’s Castle 

Emma finally falls asleep around 5 am after reading two books on horse-back riding. Her mother knocks on her door around 8am and asks if she is coming to breakfast. Emma tells her mom that she didn’t sleep well and will come eat later but the second Emma was woken up her hearts starts to race remembering the night before. It was so unreal to get outside the castle, she thought it might have been a dream but seeing the books by her bedside reminded her it was reality. She sits up anxiously and beings flipping through the books again. She doesn’t want to do anything all day except plan and imagine her next adventure. Once she is dressed, she returns to the library to try and find maps of the realm so she won’t get lost when she leaves the castle grounds. She scours the shelves and eventually comes across a map with her castle on it. She grins with excitement and begins to study the map.  
“Emma? What are you doing in here? Don’t you want to come get some breakfast?” Snow asks her while walking over to her.  
Emma quickly folds up the map and tells her mother she will be right there. She takes the map to her room and hides it under her pillow so her parents won’t find it. When she enters the dining room her parents are done eating but still sitting at the table. David calls for one of the servants to bring Emma some food. A middle-age women quickly brings her a plate of food.  
“Your mother tells me you didn’t sleep well, Emma. Was it because of our talk last night?” David asks his daughter.  
“No, it wasn’t that. I just found a good book that I couldn’t put down.” Emma lies.  
“Your mother and I were talking last night about our conversation at dinner and you are right, you can’t live your life in this castle forever. The Queen gave up specific instructions to never step foot outside this castle but…”  
“Yes? Yes?” Emma says with excitement.  
“We are going to allow you to go to the stables.” Says Snow.  
“What!? Really? Thank you!” The teenager exclaims as she sits up without having touched her food.  
“Emma, wait. We are going to have to cover your face so if the Queen is watching, she won’t recognize you.”  
“I thought that is why we had all the mirrors removed from the castle, so she couldn’t watch us. I doubt she even knows how I look!”  
“It’s better to be on the safe side but you can only go if accompanied by one of the servants. Now eat and then we can make arrangements.” David says.  
Emma is so excited to get to the stables she inhales her breakfast, her parents watching her anxiously. Once she is done she asks her parents’ permission if she can go now.  
“Shawna, could you come in here please.” Snow calls out. A bright red haired servant enters the room with a long black hooded cape in her hands. “Now Emma you are going to go down to the servant quarters and exit the castle through a door down there. Make sure you put the cloak on and Shawna will accompany you to the stables. You can stay there for one hour and one hour only.” She tells Emma who is grinning at the thought of the door she knows all too well.  
Emma is bouncing on her feet hardly listening to what her mother is saying. “Okay, got it. Can I go now?!”  
Emma and Shawna quickly make their way down to the servant’s quarter. The young blond puts the cloak on and opens the door and starts running to the stables. Shawna calls out after her to slow down but Emma doesn’t listen. She enters the stables and heads directly to Rebel. “Hey there Rebel.”  
Shawna comes running in and hears Emma speaking to the horse. “Rebel?” She asks. “Do you know this horse?”  
“Uh no. I just decided to name him that,” she clarifies.  
She spends the remaining hour interacting with the horse to ensure a bond is established (something she learned she must do in one of her books.) She can now see the Rebel has a beautiful chestnut brown coat with white cow-like spots. She gives the horse hay, brushes him and cleans out his stall.  
“So why do we have these horses if no one rides them?” She asks Shawna.  
“Your parents use to ride these horses before they agreed to the Queen’s contract. Now we {the servants} ride them to the market to get food and supplies for your family.” The red-head answers.  
“Wonderful, I’m glad they get out of these stalls.” Emma is glad to hear this. Now she knows she won’t be getting on a wild horse that has never been rode before. She also scopes out the barn and finds a saddle she plans on using later that night. After the hour is up she reluctantly returns back to the castle and tells her parents all about the experience and how grateful she is for letting her out of the castle. She feels slightly guilty for sneaking out but not enough to stop her from doing it again tonight. She spends the rest of the day looking at her maps and horse-back riding books to make sure she is exceedingly prepared for tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise they will be meeting in the next chapter!


	3. Meeting the Queen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma sneaks out a second night but this time runs into the Evil Queen.

The Forbidden Fortress

Regina wakes from her last poke in a state of confusion as she sees that it is dark outside. She turns to Maleficent as she is reaching for the needle. “What time is it? How long have I been asleep? ”The Queen asks in a mental fog.  
“A while dear, it’s nearly midnight.” She answers.  
“What?! Why didn’t you wake me?”  
“Do you have somewhere important to be? I tried to wake you but you were out, I feared you may never wake again.”  
“Are you trying to kill me? Just give me what I came for Mal, so I can get out of here.” She says still trying to wake up.  
“I watered it down a little. It would seem I made it too strong this time.” The dragon says as she hands her the vile of her concocted drug. Regina gives her finger one last poke and places a gentle hand on Mal’s cheek.  
“Until next time,” She tells the doped up women whose eyes have begun fade into the night. She arrives at her carriage and finds her driver asleep. “Sleeping on the job?” She proclaims loudly waking him up. He apologizes to her as she gets into the carriage and they begin their journey back to her castle. 

The Charming’s castle 

Emma is found once again waiting by her door for the castle to become hauntingly quiet. This time she wears the black cloak she received to go the sables earlier that day. She has a small bag packed with a candle, matches, the horse-back riding books, a map of the Realm and some red apples for Rebel. She waited longer this time to ensure the servants would all be asleep. She once again makes her way to the servant’s quarters with butterflies fluttering in her stomach. She makes is safely to the barn and the horses begin to snort and buck again. She greets rebel and gives him an apple and quiets the rest of the horses. She lights a candle and begins to make preparations to depart. She pulls out her books and flips to the chapter titled ‘Saddle Up’. She follows the step by step instructions of how to properly strap on the saddle. Rebel does not protest as Emma speaks to the horse in a soothing voice. Once the saddle is on she pets the horse and tell him the plans for the evening.  
“Okay Rebel, I’m going to take you out of the stall now and I’m going to ride you, so please behave. I’ve never done this before.” The adrenalin is beginning to pump through her veins as she blows out her candle and puts it back in her bag. She takes a couple of deep breaths and opens the fence that cages the horse in. She guides the horse by his reins outside the stables and the horse walks patiently behind her. The nervous blond walks the horse to the edge of the castle boundaries quietly whispering affirmations to her new best friend. Once she opens the gate leading out of the castle’s lands, she knows if she stalls she may decide not to go through with her plan so she gathers up all the bravery she has and places a foot in the stirrup and clumsily gets on. The horse holds his posture and accepts the inexperienced weight on his back. Emma grabs the reins, takes a deep breath, makes a clicking sounds and gently nudges the back of Rebel’s leg. Rebel begins to slowly walk forward. Emma begins to pant at the excitement of what she is doing. She feels a mixture or terror and thrill as the horse begins to walk a little faster. She pulls the left side of the rein to guide to horse to the left, down the road leading away from the Queen’s castle.  
The young girls rides slowly on the path illuminated by the moon’s wondrous glow. She takes in all the sights of the enchanted world around her. Smelling the pine trees and watching rabbits hop out of her path. Feeling the wind on her face, she has never felt more free and enlightened in all her life. Rebel all of sudden comes to a sudden halt and a second later Emma hears the hoofs of another horse trotting in her direction. Emma hastily dismounts Rebel and grabs his reins to guide him into the forest and out of the way or whoever is coming.  
The horse pulling the Queen’s carriage comes to a stop when in sensing another horse and human.  
“Why have we stopped?” A voice says coming from the carriage.  
Emma tries to stand in the shadow of the trees but the moonlight is so bright that her plan is unsuccessful.  
“There appears to be another rider on the road, milady.” The Queen’s driver announces.  
“On my road,” The Queen says furiously as she opens the door of her all black carriage with silver studs.  
Emma watches in panic as an intimidatingly beautiful women steps out of the carriage. The teenager admires the way her tight black dress accentuates her hips and how it flows gracefully down the single step directed to the ground. Her long silky hairs glows in the moonlight when she violently flips it from hanging between her right arm and torso to her back. She aggressively walks up to the blond and asks, “Just who do you think you are riding on my road at this time of night?”  
Emma’s heart sinks into her stomach as she timidly says “I’m sorry. I didn’t know this road belonged to anyone. I was just going for a walk.”  
“What’s your name girl?” The brunette asks the blond while staring her down.  
“Em...it’s Emma.” The young girl has no idea that she has just come face to face with the Evil Queen and giving her real name might not have been the best idea. The Queen has not been able to spy on the Charming’s since they removed all the mirrors from their castle so the Queen does not recognize Emma but she does know her name.  
“Emma. Emma? Emma!” The Queen repeats as she realizes just who Emma is. “The daughter of the Charmings. Oh my! This is my lucky night.” She says with malice rubbing the palms of her hands together.  
“Do I know you?” Emma asks with a slight inclination that this women might be the Evil Queen.  
“Why dear, you should. I’m the Evil Queen and you miss, should not be outside your castle.” She says forcing her face uncomfortably close to Emma’s, her eyes wide and glowing with her thirst for revenge being reignited.  
A cold chill runs down Emma’s spine and she swallows hard not knowing what to say.  
“You’re idiot parents don’t know you’re out here, do they?”  
Emma is still too scared to respond but becomes slightly agitated that she called her parents idiots.  
“Do they Emma?” The Queen says loudly making Emma jump.  
“No. You’re Majesty. But I’m not scared of you.” Emma proclaims hoping her confidence will mask how terrified she truly is.  
“Oh child, but you should be,” She puts out her palm and a small fireball ignites from the center. Regina’s magic is not what is use to be. She doesn’t use it as often anymore and the drug she is on tends to dampen it.  
“Wooh! So that’s magic!” Emma is intrigued and almost forgets she is to face with the women her parents warned her so much about. “I’ve only read about it in my books but never seen it.” Regina is flattered that Emma got so excited about her weak fireball and decides to show off a little more. She then disappears in a cloud of purple smoke and reappears behind Emma. The young blond stands dumbfounded by the Queen’s disappearance.  
“Oh, I can do much more than that dear, you should be very, very afraid.” She proclaims in a deep haunting voice, breathing over her Emma’s neck. Emma jumps not realizing that she has reappeared directly behind her. Emma is so intrigued by the Queen’s magic she forgets how scared she is.  
“You don’t scare me,” Emma repeats this time actually meaning it.  
“Hum…How brave. The rebellious daughter of Snow and Charming is not afraid of the Evil Queen who locked her in her castle for all these years? I can work with this.” The Queen says as she walks to face Emma thinking of all the ways she could use this as a way to get further revenge on the Charming’s.  
“Work with what?” Emma questions.  
“Tell you what Princess. Come to my castle tomorrow evening and I’ll show you all the magic I can do.”  
“I’m not sure that is such a good idea. You may not frighten me but my parents have told me stories and I’m not sure I can trust you.” Emma states looking the Queen in the eyes. Emma knows she should be more terrified of the Queen and perhaps it was because Regina was high but she didn’t seem so evil despite how hard she was trying to appear to be. Not to mention her parents never told her that the Evil Queen was extremely beautiful which intimidated Emma more than any of her threats.  
“You shouldn't trust me but I’m not going to harm you child. You interest me. You’re not like your parents and I like that.”  
Emma knows it’s probably a bad idea to go but something about the Queen is so enticing, she wants more of her. The thought of how mischievous it would be to go to the Queen’s castle gives Emma a wicked high and now she is on a rebellious streak that she doesn’t plan on ending. Regina asks her if she knows how to get to her Castle. Emma reaches into her bag to grab the map but her hands are shaking and as she fumbles through her bag all of the contents spill out. Regina picks up one of the red apples and looks at it with glee.  
“Ah! Red apples, my favorite. How did you know?” The Queen says before she takes a purposeful bite. Emma can’t help but look at the way she puts her luscious lips around the apple. She gives the rest of the apple to the horse and picks up her book. “Horse-back riding? Really?”  
“What? I didn’t know how to ride a horse! I haven’t been allowed to leave the castle, thanks to you.” Emma says annoyed.  
“Wow! You’ve got sass dear. You really were desperate to get out of there. Can’t say I blame you, your parents are quite insufferable.” She says as she hands the book back to Emma. “Tell you what, how about I send for a carriage to come get you tomorrow night. You’ll probably get lost or your horse will get out of control and I’m not saving anyone from a runaway horse ever again.”  
“Fine.” Emma says feeling insulted.  
“It will pick you up right where we are standing at midnight.” The Queen says while walking back to her carriage.  
Emma’s head is so full of thoughts and she didn’t get very far so she decides to walk with the horse back. Once Emma is safely back in her room she can’t stop thinking about what just happened. Emma was so captivated by the Queen’s presence she feels as though she cast a spell on her. He stomach fills with butterflies’ every time she thinks about going to the Queen’s castle. Am I actually going to do this? What if this is some trick? What if she traps me in her castle? She knows she should fear the Queen but for some odd reason she didn’t. Emma closes her eyes and the image or Regina’s fireball and her disappearing in purple smoke appears in her head. She can’t believe she has lived in a magical realm for 17 years and never seen anyone do magic, she wanted to see more. She eventually drifts off to sleep and dreams of magic and the Queen.


	4. The Best Birthday

The Charming’s Castle

“Happy Birthday!” Snow and David say as they open Emma’s bedroom door. Behind them are a couple of servants carrying trays for food. Every birthday her parents bring her, her favorite breakfast, scrambled eggs covered in melted cheese with a side of ham. With all the excitement Emma has had the past couple of nights, she had totally forgotten that today was her birthday. Emma thanks her parents and begins to eat as they go to sit on the sofa in her room.  
“We were going to wait to let you go to the sables till today but your mother and I decided to let you go a day early.” David says.  
“You’re 18 now and we know you have outgrown getting toys for your birthday and we know all you want is to leave this castle but...” Snow says.  
“Yes? Yes?” Emma asks anxiously cutting her off.  
“It’s too much of a risk. But your mother and I came up with an alternate idea for your birthday. We decided we will send a letter to the Queen asking if she would grant you permission to roam the castle grounds. We know she will never let either of us out of the castle but maybe her wrath hasn’t extended to you.” David says nervously.  
“That’s a fantastic birthday gift! Thank you! Thank you!” Emma says bouncing up and down.  
“Now, don’t get your hopes up, Emma. The Queen is not the benevolent sort.” Snow says.  
“It’s perfect! Thank you guys! Tell me as soon as you receive and answer.”  
“Will do sweetheart.” Snow assumes her.  
“So, tell me more about the Evil Queen?” Emma asks her parents. Emma has heard them talk about her many times but now she has some more specific questions, having met her.  
“What do you want to know that we haven’t already told you?” David asks.  
“I know she is Evil and tried to kill you guys, especially you mom but do you think there is a chance she has changed?” Emma asks.  
“Sure Emma, everyone can change. I have hope. I knew Regina before she became the Evil Queen and she was completely different. She saved my life, that’s how we met and she was kind then but some people hold onto revenge and let the darkness consume them and once you give into the darkness, it’s hard to get out.” Snow answers.  
“So what does she look like?” Emma obviously already knew but wants to hear how her parents describe her.  
“Why do you want to know Emma?” David questions.  
Emma quickly comes up with a cover story, “well, if she does let me leave the castle then I should know who to look out for if she happens to be passing by.”  
“Good point. I’m not certain how she dresses anymore but she use to wear a lot of black and her dresses were adorned with jewels or feathers. She usually had a high collar on the dresses that came up to her ears. Lots of dark make-up and long, long dark hair. She was always extremely over the top and unmistakably appeared evil.” Snow answers.  
“Is she pretty?” Emma asks.  
Snow looks at her slightly confused but answers, “before she became the Evil Queen I thought she was beautiful but once her heart filled with darkness I couldn’t stand to look at her. She had no soul in her eyes and it made her unattractive.” Snow responds. Emma can’t help but picture the Queen and how beautiful she was. “Trust me, if you ever see her, you’ll know exactly who she is.”  
“And she has magic, correct?”  
“Yes but its dark magic,” Snow answers.  
“Is all magic dark?”  
“No. There is light magic as well but all magic comes with a price, Emma. It’s best not to trifle with any of it, magic is not safe. Now enjoy your breakfast and we will go prepare the letter to send to the Queen.”  
Snow and David go to their room and Snow gets out a piece of parchment and her quill and ink and begins to write. 

Your Majesty,  
Today is our daughter’s 18 birthday and we are hoping you can find it in her heart to grant her permission to leave the castle. She will remain on the grounds and we ask to ensure no harm will come to her from you or any of your guards. David and I will remain in the castle as promised in our contact but our daughter has caused you no harm.  
Sincerely,  
Snow White

Snows whistles out the window and a small blue bird arrives landing on her pointer finger. She ties the letter to one of his small legs and tells it to deliver this to the Queen. The bird departs and Snow turns to David with a nervous look on her face, “what if this makes things worse? Are we sure this was for the best?”  
“We have to have hope, Snow and we promised Emma. It’s been 18 years. We haven’t heard any news of the Queen tormenting any of our subjects in a decade, maybe she has softened up.” David reassures her. 

The Queen’s Castle

Regina wakes up in her large bed surrounded by black pillows. Her days always begins with a poke so she doesn’t have to spend the morning with any thoughts of her pain in her head. But on this morning she thinks about last night and her meeting with Emma and it gives her a sense of excitement. Excitement she has not felt in ages. She has not had a visitor come to her castle in over a decade. For the first time in a long time, she doesn’t want to poke her finger but now that she is addicted, her addiction is stronger than her self-will so she dips the needle in the vile and pricks her finger.  
Although not as strong, she still feels anger towards Snow and thought she would feel the same way to any offspring she produced but something about Emma was different. She couldn’t explain why she didn’t want to hurt Emma or somehow use her to further torture the Charmings. As she thought about all this, all of a sudden a small blue bird flies to her bedside. Regina’s first thought is that it might be a letter from Emma and she removes the letter and beings to read. She reads the letter over five times and is curious if Emma has told her parents about their meeting last night but knows the rebellious teen most likely did not. She ponders what she should say in response and if saying no will deter Emma from coming tonight so she decides to allow it. She grabs a piece and parchment and quill and neatly writes,

I grant your daughter permission to exit the castle but remain on castle grounds. No harm will come to her. You and David will remain in the castle until death.  
~The Queen

She whistles to a nearby raven who promptly flows over to the queen’s vanity where she has written the letter. She attaches the letter to one of his legs and tells the bird to take the letter to Emma.  
The Charming’s Castle  
Once Emma is dressed, she patiently sits on her balcony awaiting a response from the Queen. She has a feeling that she will say yes but she might still be so angry with her parents that she says no. Either way, Emma is going to see her tonight and can ask her about the answer she gets. She has so many questions for the Queen about magic and can’t wait to see what other tricks she can do. Emma is looking longingly down at the gardens and wishes she could be running through them again in the daylight when all of a sudden she hears a raven caw and sees that it is heading straight towards her. The raven dives down to her balcony and lands on the ledge. Emma anxiously retrieves the letter from his leg and takes a deep breath. She reads it three times and starts jumping up and down and runs to her parents’ bedroom.  
“She said yes! She said yes! I can leave the castle! She isn’t evil! Can I go now?” Emma says hastily, still bounding up and down.  
“Wooh, slow down! Let me see the letter.” David says and Emma hands him the letter.  
“I suppose the Queen isn’t so evil anymore. But Emma, remember, you must stay on the castle grounds, always take a servant with you and be on the lookout for a black carriage passing by. You must immediately hide if you see one coming down the road. Got it? You must come in once the sun starts to set and absolutely no going out when it’s dark. This could be a trick and I still don’t trust her so you have to be careful.” Snow tells her.  
“I’ll be safe! I promise! Can I please go now!?” Emma bolts out the door and heads down to the servants quarters after her mom tell her she can go. She was so excited about getting to go outside in the daylight that she forgot the ‘bring a servant with you’ part that her mother said. Not soon after she is outside, the servant Shawna comes running after her upon Snow’s instructions.  
Emma spends all day outside, running through the gardens and visiting Rebel in the horse stalls. She loves admiring all the colorful flowers and smelling each variety. She picks a flower of every color to bring in a bouquet to give her parents as a thank you for her spectacular birthday gift. She didn’t even notice that her parents had been in the window all day watching over her to make sure she stays safe. She brings Rebel some apples and it reminds her of when Regina took a bite of one last night. Every times she think about the Queen she gets nervous and anxious about going to her castle tonight. She alternates between thinking it’s a bad idea and a good one but she knows she is going to go no matter what. Once the sun begins to set she hears her father’s voice call her in for dinner. She runs to the dinner table and hands her parents the beautiful botanical bouquet and thanks them. She tells them all about her day and how she has never had a better birthday. The Charming’s love her enthusiasm but are still nervous about the Queen’s intentions and they still are questioning why she said yes. After cake, everyone retires to their rooms and Emma begins to mentally prepare for another extremely rebellious evening.


	5. Appletini

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma sneaks out of her castle and goes to the Queens. Emma has her first drink of alcohol and gets more intoxicated than she had planned.

The Queen’s Castle  
Midway through the day the Queen decides she wants her magic to be powerful so she doesn’t drug herself. Instead she makes herself an appletini to take the edge off the withdrawals. She spends the day preforming all the magic tricks she hasn’t used in years so she won’t let Emma down. Once it gets closer to the evening she decides to get dressed. She first poofs herself into one of her Evil Queen outfits but decides it is a little over the top for the occasion. She still wants to look like a Queen and hasn’t has an occasion to get dressed up for in a while so she decides to wears her red velvet dress with black lace that covers her cleavage and tightens around her waist. She poofs on her usual dark black make-up and fixers her long hair in simply ponytail on top of her head. Once boredom gets the best of her she looks to the vile containing her drug of choice. Her addiction takes over and she decides just one poke won’t hurt and pricks her finger. She nods into a dreamlike state and remains laying on her couch until Emma arrives.  
The Charming’s Castle  
Emma paces back and forth watching the clock. Each minute feels like an hour and she wishes she had magic to make time go by faster. She can hardly believe she is going to the Queen’s Castle tonight especially after 18 years of being warned about her. Around 11:30 her nerves can’t take it any longer and she decides to head to the spot that the carriage will be picking her up. She makes it safely out of the castle without getting caught and stands in the forest just beside the road and begins to pace. Am I really doing this, she thinks to herself? What if this is a trick? But she granted me permission to leave the castle, so she must not hate me, right? After 15 minutes of her mind racing, she hears horse hooves and a carriage in the distance and she begins to take deep breaths. The driver pulls up and asks for the young girl’s name. Emma tell him her name and he instructs her to get in. Once Emma is inside she is astonished by how beautiful the carriage is. She admires the black velvet and gracefully pets the soft walls. She has never been inside a carriage before and once they start moving she looks out the window with anticipation. Aside from riding a horse, this was the seconds biggest thrill ride of Emma’s life.  
After about 30 minutes of riding Emma sees the Queen’s castle in the distance. She loves how spiky and ominous it looks. She has never seen another castle and can’t wait to go inside. Once they are inside the castle grounds, the carriage slows down and comes to a halt by the front entrance. She expects to be greeted by Regina and is disappointed when she is not there. The guards at the front gate open the door for her and her eyes grow large and take in the beauty of this unfamiliar castle. No candles are lit so the castle is very dark and has haunted vibe to it but Emma likes it.  
“Right this way,” one of the guards tells her and begins walking up a large staircase. Emma obeys and follows behind him to the room where Regina is. She is still sitting on the couch by the fireplace, eyes hardly open and holding her appletini. Emma takes one look at her and immediately freezes. Her beauty makes Emma’s eyes melt. Emma thought she was stunning in the moonlight but seeing her light up by the fire was even more spectacular. Everything about her seemed perfect. The way she sat so elegantly on her chair, the way her hair shined so brilliantly in the fire’s glow, the way her dark make up make her eyes look so intoxicating, and the way the dress she wore made her body look so desirable. Everything about her, is perfection.  
Regina slowly looks up at Emma with a look that could kill and Emma nervously says, “Hello Your Majesty.”  
“Emma! I must say I’m surprised you came.” She responds in a deep voice that sounds like she just woke up.  
Emma isn’t quite sure how to answer, she is still so intimidated by the Queen’s beauty. The first thing she thinks to say is, “thanks for allowing for me to leave the castle. It was the greatest birthday gift ever.”  
“Ah, that’s right! It’s your birthday today. How about a drink?” Regina says standing up.  
“Uh, sure. I’ve never had a drink before. My parents don’t allow it.”  
“Of course they don’t allow it.” She says rolling her eyes. “Well you’re 18 now. I think you deserve a drink.” The Queen then poofs an appletini in her other hand. “I do hope you like apples.”  
Emma is impressed by her magic but tries to keep her cool, she is also skeptical about the drink. She remembers the countless times her mother has told stories about the Evil Queen giving her a poison apple.  
“Is it poisonous?” Emma asks looking at the drink.  
“Haha no dear. Although some would call it a type of poison.” Regina answers. Emma still isn’t sure if she should trust her and continues to stare at it in contemplation. “Here, I’ll show you.” Regina says and takes a sip of the drink and then hands it to her, “see?”  
Emma takes the drink and takes a tiny sip and her taste buds explode. “Wow! This is delicious!” she says and takes another sip and her stomach fills with an unfamiliar warmth. With just one sip, she can already feel her nerves beginning to relax.  
“Now, you came here to see some magic, correct?” Regina asks.  
“Yes! Yes, please.”  
“So well mannered,” Regina says laughing. Emma takes a gulp of her drink and it goes down the wrong pipe and she begins coughing. “Slow down!”  
“Sorry!” Emma says while trying to stop coughing. Regina poofs a glass of water in her hand and gives it to Emma. Emma takes a couple of sips and stops coughing. Regina is confused about how to act around Emma. At first she was hoping she could somehow use the teenager to get revenge on her parents but something about her presence makes Regina act…well…normal. She has a strange desire to impress Emma which she doesn’t quite understand. She thought maybe it was just how lonely she had become that any company, even the spawn of her enemy would fill the void.  
“So can you just make anything you want appear in your hands?” Emma asks.  
“For the most part, yes. It has to be something that actually exist of course. Let’s call it my first trick of the evening. Is there anything else you would like?”  
Emma finishes the remainder of her appletini and asks, “how about another one of these?”  
“Pace yourself dear,” Regina says as she poofs another drink in her hand and gives it to Emma. Emma is surprised that the Queen is being so nice to her. She wonders if all her parents’ stories were all exaggerations or if the Queen had gone soft or maybe the Queen just likes her. Emma didn’t question it too much because the alcohol in her system was starting to cloud her brain.  
“So what else can you do?” Emma asks slighting starting to sway.  
“Why don’t you take a seat? My drinks tend to be on the strong side!” Regina says with a giggle and points to the sofa by the fire.  
“Right.” Emma replies and go to sit down. She feels much less nervous and more confident now. Emma sits down and looks up at the Queen openly staring her up and down and admiring her beauty. They lock eyes for a long moment until Regina finally speaks.  
“Right. So, magic.” She says and she swirls her hand and the fire that was igniting the logs of the fireplace all of a sudden goes out and appears in a ball in her hand. She smiles with pride as Emma’s jaw drops. She then throws the fireball back into the fireplace, reigniting the logs. “Fireballs are my signature.” She says with a smile. Regina is surprised that her magic is still strong even with some drugs still left in her system. She is happy that the brushed up on her skills and happy she didn’t use the needle as much as a usual day.  
“Impressive, Your Majesty! Emma says with a grin on her face and takes another sip of her drink. “What else can you do?”  
Regina swirls her hand and a cloud of purple smoke appears around her, when is disappears it reveals that she has changed her outfit and hairstyle. She is now wearing one of her Evil Queen outfits. An all-black dress with thousands of jewels covering the collar and an up-do hairstyle.  
“Wooh! So that’s what my parents were talking about,” Emma says shocked.  
“Excuse me?” The Queen asks.  
“Oh! Um… I was just asking them about you this morning,” Emma says finding her ability to lie not present. “I mean not in a bad way I was just wondering how you dressed. I mean I…um…never mind.” Emma stutters. Regina can tell that Emma is nervous and decides to ignore what she said and swirls her hand and is changed back in her previous outfit.  
“My parents said that you have dark magic so does that mean that everything you are doing is dark? Emma asks.  
“Yes Emma, this is dark magic but there is no need to be afraid. Magic is magic. I’m sure your parents told you all about how terrible magic is but don’t listen to them.”  
“It doesn’t seem so terrible to me.” Emma responds and Regina smiles and gives her a pleased look.  
The more Emma knows about magic the more she wishes she could do it so she decides to ask Regina, “So how do you know if you have magical abilities.”  
“Some people are born with it. Others learn from a teacher.”  
“We’re you born with it?” Emma asks.  
“No. I learned from a man more evil than I am…or was. Rumpelstiltskin.” She says walking over to Emma to sit down on the couch next to her.  
“The dark one. I’ve read about him but I didn’t know he was a magic teacher.”  
“He was a cruel teacher but he did teach me everything I know.”  
Emma finishes her drink and asks, “Does he still teach?”  
“No. He is locked away for good. You wouldn’t want to meet him.” Regina responds and she can see the disappointment in Emma’s eyes.  
They sit in silence for some time and then Emma’s eyes begin to squint and her body starts to sway more as the second drink begins to hit her.  
“I think it’s time to get you home dear.” Regina says placing a hand on her back.  
“But I just got here! I want to see more!” Emma says disappointed.  
Emma can tell that she is drunk now. The room is spinning and Regina now has two heads. She slurs her words as she asks, “Why are you being so nice to me?”  
“How do you know I didn’t just poison you?” Regina asks with a wicked grin. Since Emma has never been intoxicated before, her first thought is that the Queen has indeed poisoned her. The thought sobers her up a bit and a look of terror comes across her face.  
Regina giggles and tells her “I’m joking!” The Queen avoids the question because she too is not sure why she is being so nice to her either but she does know that she wants to see her again and asks her to “come back tomorrow night but only one drink allowed.”  
Emma can barely open her eyes now and decides to ask the question again later because now all she wants is to be laying in her own bed. She stands up from the couch and the alcohol goes rushing to her head and she almost falls over. Regina catches her before she falls on her face and laughs.  
“I’m sorry,” Emma says.  
“Not a problem,” The Queen responds. “I’ll assist you to the carriage.” Emma puts her arm around Regina and can instantly smell her perfume which she thinks smells amazing. Emma had no idea that alcohol would make her say the first thing on her mind and she blurts out, “You smell delicious.” Regina raises both her eyebrows lefts the corner of her mouth and gives a simple thanks. They begin to walk down to the carriage and the alcohol has made Emma lose her inhibition and she slurs, “You’re really beautiful,” to the Queen. Regina can smell the appletini on her breath and knows Emma probably won’t remember this and gives another simple thanks. Regina is happy that the castle is dark because she didn’t want Emma to notice that she was blushing.  
They walk down to the carriage where the driver is waiting and he opens the door for Emma.  
Emma grabs onto the door and turns around and says, “Thank you, Your Majesty.”  
“See you tomorrow night. Oh and Emma…you can call me Regina,” she says with a grin.  
“Goodnight Regina.” Emma responds with eyes barely open and a wide smile and then she gets in the carriage.


	6. Magic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma spends her morning getting rid of her hangover and gets into an argument with her parents at lunch. She spends the remained of her day outside anticipating seeing Regina again. Regina decides to quit drugging herself and is struggling with withdrawls. Emma sneaks out to go to the Queens and receives shocking news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the sake of this story, Shakespeare existed in the Enchanted Forest!

The Queen’s Castle

Regina awoke with a renewed sense of confidence and feeling like she had a new reason to live. Instead of her first though being to reach for her vile and needle, it was Emma and their encounter the previous evening. She didn’t want to admit it to herself but she knew deep down this new sense of happiness was because of Emma. She hadn’t had someone call her beautiful or tell her that she smelt good in a long time and it felt good, better than good, wonderful. She had a feeling that if Emma remembered telling her those things that she would probably regret it but Regina did not regret hearing it. So for the first time in a while Regina woke up with a smile on her face. She looked at the vile and felt disgusted. Thinking about her past drug use felt like she was watching someone else doing it, not her. She thinks to herself, what have I been doing with my life? This isn’t me. To make a typical Regina statement she grabs the vile and throws it against the wall, shattering the glass and then poofs away all her needles.   
She doesn’t regret throwing away her drug but now she was beginning to withdrawal and felt sick. She knew it would probably just last a day or two like a really bad hangover. Her magic could heal wounds and get rid of bruises but no magic was powerful enough to stop the feeling of drugs leaving her body. Unfortunately, her magic is not as strong when she doesn’t feel well and hopes she will be better by tonight when Emma comes. Regina can’t pinpoint why every time she thinks of Emma it makes her smile. We have only met twice, she thinks to herself.   
The Queen doesn’t feel well all day and decides to take it easy and relax. She is anxious and uncomfortable going through withdrawals but has no desire to poke herself again. Once is gets closer to evening the Queen starts getting ready for Emma’s arrival. She poofs on her dark makeup and puts her hair in a casual up-do. She goes with an elegant black velvet dress that is jeweled around the edges and puts on the perfume that Emma had said smelt delicious. She sits on her couch and not soon after drifts asleep until Emma’s arrival. 

The Charming’s Castle

Emma wakes up parched and with a pounding headache. She sits up to grab the cup of water by her bedside and the room begins to spin. “I’m never drinking again,” she says to herself. She chugs the glass of water and goes back to bed until her mom knocks on the door. Her mom’s knocking and voice sounds 10 times louder than usual when she tells her that breakfast is being served. Emma puts a pillow over her head and tells her mother that she is not feeling well and is going to sleep a little longer. She desperately wants to go outside again but when she sits up her head begins to throb. So she sleeps until 1pm, until her headache has gone down.   
When she wakes up, she lays in bed mentally going over all that happened last night. The carriage ride home is a complete blur because she slept the whole time and doesn’t remember how she got to her room. She remembers sitting on Regina’s couch and watching her with the fireball and magically changing her outfit. She remembers asking Regina about who taught her magic and learning that is was Rumpelstiltskin. She remembers nearly falling over when she got up and…oh…god…telling the Queen she was beautiful and smelt delicious. Did I really say that out loud she questions. Shit! Shit! Delicious? Why Emma! Who says delicious? She must think I’m some weird creep. She thinks to herself. The beautiful thing was beyond true and she doesn’t regret that as much but…delicious! Emma puts her head in the palm of her hands in embarrassment. Did I agree to go back tonight? She wonders. She tried to recall what she said when the Queen told her to come again tonight but can’t for the life of her remember if she agreed to. She figures she will just go out at the same time and see if a carriage pulls up because despite her embarrassment, she really wants to see the Queen again. The Queen, Emma thinks as she smiles. Uh, she is just so enticing and intimidating and frightening all at the same time. Emma pictures her sitting on the couch by the fire and the way her eyes slowly looked up to her. Emma realizes that she is extremely turned on when she thinks about the Queen and isn’t quite sure how to process it. ‘What is wrong with me?’ Emma questions, realizing her thoughts are anything but clean. I have to stop thinking like this, Emma thinks and quickly pops out of bed and decides to stop festering in her room. She goes downstairs to get something to eat because her stomach was grumbling and she feels like food will help the hang-over. Emma puts on some casual cloths and goes down stairs where her parents are still at the table finishing lunch.  
“Emma, are you feeling better?” Her mother asks.  
“Yes, I was just tired. Probably from all the excitement of yesterday.” She responds.   
“Come and get something to eat.” Her father says gesturing to the table.   
Lunch is usually set out of the table for them to pick and choose what they want as opposed to other meals when it is brought to them. Emma grabs a piece of bread, a slice of turkey and some roasted vegetables. As soon as she starts eating she begins to feel better and her headache has almost completely subsided.   
“Are you going outside today?” Her mother asks.  
“Absolutely! As soon as I’m done eating!” She responds with glee.   
“Just please be careful Emma, your father and I are still worried about the Queen’s motives.” Snow says.  
“I promise I’ll be careful and I really don’t think we need to worry about the Queen. She doesn’t seem so evil anymore. I think she is pretty nice actually,” Emma says with food in her mouth, not really thinking about what she is saying.   
“You think she is nice? Just how would you know that?” Snows questions with a concerned look on her face.   
“I’m just saying I think she is nice because she granted me permission to leave the castle, wouldn’t you agree?” Emma saves it.  
“I suppose. But the Queen always has her reasons for doing things and we are just concerned about what hers may be.” David says.  
“I think you guys don’t give her enough credit. Maybe she is just being nice or doesn’t hate me as much as she hates you guys.”   
“Emma! She spent years trying to kill me, tried to cast a curse just to get revenge on me and trapped us all in this castle. She does not deserve any credit. Of course I’m happy you are allowed to roam the grounds but you have to understand why I am skeptical.” Snow says raising her voice.   
“Okay! I get it!” Emma responds rolling her eyes. She finishes eating her meal in silence but desperately wants to know more about Regina and tries to casually ask her parents more questions.   
“So the Queen was in love once before, correct?”   
“Yes Emma, you know this and because I told her secret, she lost her true love. Can we please not talk about this anymore and what’s this current fascination with her about anyways? You have never cared to talk about her before.” Snows says looking at Emma confused.   
“It’s not a fascination! Is it so wrong for me to be curious about the women who trapped us here and then one day allows me leave the castle? You know what, never mind. I’m going outside now.” She responds while standing up. Emma was so annoyed that she wished she knew how to ride a horse better and where the Queen’s castle was because so would go there right then. “I’m not fascinated with her,” she grumbles under her breath while walking away.   
“What was that about?” Snow asks her husband.  
“I think she is just being a teenager. I wouldn’t worry about it.” David responds.   
“I can still hear you guys!” Emma yells up the servant’s stairway.   
Emma dashes outside and with her first inhale of fresh air, her hang over is one-hundred percent gone now. She throws her arms to her side and spins in circles, happy to be free and away from her parents. Outside of the castle is now her domain where no one can tell her what to do. The servant Shawna must always be outside with her but she usually sits outside and knits and occasionally asks Emma if she is doing alright. Emma always gives the same answer, “of course I am.” This time she asks Shawna if she can walk Rebel around the grounds. The servant runs inside to ask her parents and returns with a smile on her face which Emma knows means they said yes. Shawna puts the reins on the horse (since Emma is not supposed to know how to but secretly does) and begins to walk to horse around the castle. She has a one hour, one-sided therapy session with her horse and tells him all about her argument with her parents, meeting the Queen, her incredible magic, and how excited she is to see her again tonight. Emma doesn’t remember that the Queen told her to call her Regina so she still refers to her as “the Queen” or “her Majesty.” After her walk with Rebel she decides to visit the garden again but first runs inside to get a book to read. She chooses her favorite classic romance ‘Romeo and Juliet’. The story about two people in love whose families forbade them to be together. She thought it somewhat fitting since her parents would never let her be with Regina….not that she loved her or anything…her parents would just forbid her from ever seeing her…as friends, she justifies. After three hours of laying on a patch of grass amidst a patch of lavender, she hears Shawna running up to tell her that dinner is being served. She closes her book in disappointment and heads back inside.   
Dinner is awkwardly quiet. All Emma wants to do is talk about the Queen and is still slightly annoyed with her parents. She tells them about her day outside and they tell about theirs inside. After they are done eating, everyone retires to their room and Emma can hardly wait for it to be 11:30. Her parents come to say goodnight and tell her that they just want her to be safe and that they love her and blah blah. She wants to tell her parents to just leave her alone but she knows they will blame her anger on her “being a teenager,” which irritates to crap out of her. To pass the time she decides to keep reading ‘Romeo and Juliet’ and nearly falls asleep. She tiredly looks up at the clock and sees that it is 11:15 and quickly gets up, throws on her cloak and begins her nightly sneak out routine.   
She makes it outside just in time to find the Queen’s carriage pulling up. The driver now knows who Emma is and tells her to get in. Emma quickly enters to beautiful carriage with excitement and anticipation. She arrives at the Queen’s castle and once again the guards open the doors to her dark and mysterious castle and lead her upstairs to the Queens room without saying a word. Emma is expecting the gorgeous Queen to be sitting by the fire holding a drink. Instead she is laying on the couch in a dark, unlit room.   
Emma clears her throat and says, “Hello? Your Majesty?” The young blond is extremely nervous and embarrassed about her behavior the previous evening. “I don’t mean to wake you.”  
“Emma, dear, I told you to call me Regina,” The Queen says in a deep groggy, just woke up voice.   
“Oh, sorry I forgot.” Emma replies. “I forgot if we arranged to meet this evening but I figured since the carriage came…but if you want to sleep then…” Emma says awkwardly.  
“Oh, no dear. I was just resting. Please come sit.” Regina says while sitting up.   
Emma nervously goes and sits down by the Queen. She is questioning whether or not she should apologize for how drunk she was or play it cool, like she does not regret anything. She decides to apologize because she doesn’t know what else to say. “I’m sorry about last night, I didn’t know alcohol would make me act like that.”  
“That’s alight. You were quite entertaining,’” Regina says with a giggle.   
“Don’t ever let me have more than one drink again! I felt terrible this morning!”  
Emma can’t really see Regina since the fire was not lit but she could sense that something was wrong and decides to ask, “are you feeling alright.”  
“I’m fine. No need to worry.” Regina answers covering up the fact that she still does not feel well.   
“It a little dark in here,” Emma tells her.   
Regina holds out the palm of her hand and tried to create a fireball to ignite the logs…but no fire comes. She tries multiple times, cursing herself for it not working.   
“What happened to your magic?” Emma questions.   
“It’s not as powerful when I don’t feel well,” She says while still attempting but only getting small flames.   
“I’m sorry Regina,” Emma says caringly and gentle places her hand on the Queen’s forearm. All of a sudden, upon Emma’s touch, a tremendous fireball ignites in the palm of Regina’s hand. She quickly throws it in the fireplace, instantly lighting up the room. Emma stands up less than a second later and asks, “what just happened?!”  
Regina is just as confused as Emma and stands up and begins pacing in front of the fire in deep thought.   
“Regina? What is going on?” Emma asks nervous as ever, unsure if she upset the Queen.   
“Emma…that was magic,” she says looking into the fire and still pacing.   
“I know. I’ve seen you throw fireballs before but how come it only worked this time when I…” Emma fades the sentence afraid to say ‘touched you’.   
“That was your magic!” She says taking a step towards the confused girl. “That made mine work.” Regina places both arms on Emma’s shoulders and looks deep into her eyes. “You have magic.”  
Emma is so shocked by what she is hearing coming out of Regina’s mouth that she doesn’t know how to answer. Her eyes start to tear up with excitement and joy and all she can say is, “Are you sure?”   
“Emma, do you know what this means?” Regina asks still holding onto her shoulders. Emma is so overwhelmed by learning that she has magic and the fact that she is so close to Regina that she has no idea what it could possibly mean. If Regina wasn’t holding onto her shoulders she probably would have fallen to the ground.   
“What?” She asks looking deep into Regina’s dark chocolate eyes.   
“I can teach you magic!” The Queen states while lowering her hands from Emma’s shoulders to her hands.   
It is not at all the response Emma expected to hear and she is filled with ecstasy. Regina teaching me magic! There is nothing I want more in the world. She thinks to herself. “You can?” She hesitates to say. There is nothing Emma could desire more than to have magic abilities. She read about it in countless books and was fascinated by the idea. She never thought she would meet someone who could perform magic and now teach her! Not to mention it was the Queen, the beautiful, enticing, wondrous Queen whom Emma was taught to fear but now cannot get off her mind.   
Regina is also elated by the idea of teaching Emma magic. She felt it would give her a new purpose in life, a reason to stop wasting away her days with a needle in her finger. It is also the last thing the Charming’s would want their precious daughter to be doing so even the more reason to teach her.   
Emma finally gathers her thought and says, “I would love nothing more than to have you teach me magic.” They both look into each other’s eyes with passion and warmth. Regina can’t help but feel love in her heart when looking into Emma’s eyes and she senses that Emma is looking at her the same way.


	7. First Lesson

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Regina goes to Rumplestiltskin to see what he knows about Emma. Emma goes to the Queen's castle for her first lesson in dark magic.

The Charming’s Castle

Emma didn’t sleep much when she got home that night. Her head was filled with thoughts of magic and the Queen. Despite how badly she had wanted to stay, she left Regina’s castle soon after her discovery because she could tell the Queen wasn’t feeling very well. Regina had told her to wait a week to come back so she could make preparations for teaching her magic and to make sure her powers were back and powerful as ever. Emma agreed but she desperately wanted to return every night but thought it’s probably best and it would also lower her chances of getting caught if she wasn’t sneaking out every night.   
Luckily the days went by quickly, she spent them playing outside, walking Rebel around the estate and reading in the garden. The nights were tough to get through though. She lay awake thinking about all the magic she could possibly learn and how powerful she could become. She pictured herself throwing fireballs and poofing into sexy outfits like Regina’s. More than anything, she thought about Regina and how excited she was to be spending so much time with her. 

The Queen’s Castle

Regina awoke once again with a smile on her face, feeling one-hundred percent better than the previous day. Now that the drugs had left her body, she felt she was getting back to her old self, maybe a little less evil but more like the confident Queen she was before. She decided to visit Rumpelstiltskin who is locked in the dungeon of her castle. She hasn’t been down there in years and wonders what Rumple knows about Emma. Regina enters the dark, dank dungeon holding a torch.   
“Hello? Rumple?” Regina says slowly and unsure.   
“Ah! The Queen, the Queen, the Queen! My greatest failure, come to pay old Rumple a visit. To what do I own the honor of this visit dearie? It’s been a very, very long time.” Rumple says approaching the entrance of his cell and putting his scaly hands on the bars.   
“Hello Rumple! Still enjoying your cell?” Regina asks sarcastically.  
“Still enjoying being a failure? Now, why are you here?” He asks now poking his head through the bars.  
Regina takes a couple steps closer to him and asks, “What do you know about the Charming’s daughter? Emma.”  
“Emma. Emma? Emma! The Savior!” He says realizing just who she is.  
“The savior? I thought she was only the savior if I would have cast the curse?”  
“Saviors don’t only exist to break curses dearie. Sometimes to defeat a villain and sometimes simply to save someone.”  
“So why is she still the savior? There are no curses to break, no villains to defeat and no one to save.” Regina asks confused.   
“Oh Your Majesty… have you not been sticking yourself with a sleeping curse for the past 18 years?”   
“What’s it to you? And why does that matter?” Regina asks annoyed.  
“Did you not just recently stop upon meeting Miss Emma?” Rumple says coyly.  
“That’s irrelevant. Why is it that her magic was only revealed when mine wasn’t working?”  
“The savior’s magic works when there is someone that needs saving.”  
“What are you saying Rumple? That I needed saving? That Emma is the savior because you think I stopping essentially cursing myself because of her?”  
“One could say, she broke your curse.” Rumple says with a malicious grin.   
“That’s a stretch. No one saves me but me. Emma had nothing to do with this. You think your wise Rumple but you have no idea what you’re talking about.” The Queen says full of anger not wanting to admit he was probably right.   
“Tsk tsk, so defensive Your Majesty. I was only pointing out what you have yet to admit.”  
“I’m not admitting anything and especially not that. Emma did not break me out of any curse, I’m the Queen, I cast curses.” Regina says walking away from Rumple. “Enjoy your cell…forever.”  
“You’ll be back dearie. You always come back and next time you will know I’m right.” He says poking his face out as far as possible between the bars.   
Regina returns to her room thinking about what Rumple had said. She did not break me out of any curse, she thinks to herself. I’m sure there is another reason why her magic started working, she continues as she faces by her fireplace. Regina tries to stop thinking about it by deciding what she is going to teach Emma first. She ponders the question, trying to remember what Rumple first taught her. She decided she would try and teach Emma how to make an object disappear and if it proved to be too difficult she would think of something else.

The Charming’s Castle

Finally a week had passed and Emma could hardly wait for the sun to set and the house to be asleep so she could see the Queen again. She wondered what she as going to teach her first, probably something easy, she thought but nothing about magic seemed easy. She sat anxiously in her room waiting for 11:30 to come so she could make her way to the Queen’s. She paced by the fire pretending to throw fireballs like Regina had done. She hoped that one day soon she could do that as well. Finally, the time came and she began her sneak-out routine and made it safely out to the road. She wondered what she would tell her parents if she ever got caught. On her walk to the road, she concocted multiple different alibies she hoped would work. For example she forgot her book outside earlier that day or was paranoid she didn’t shut her horse’s stall all the way.   
The routine always went the same way, the carriage pulled up, Emma got in, she arrived at the castle and the doorman opened the door and led her up to where Regina was. Not a word was spoken between Emma and any of the Queen’s guards. As Emma made her way up the Castle’s large staircase her stomach filled with butterflies and her mind raced with what she was going to say. But the moment she laid her eyes on the Queen, her mind stopped and she forgot what she had decided on for a greeting, luckily Regina was first to speak.  
“Emma dear, so good to see you again.” She said sitting on her couch holding an appletini. The way her eyes moved from the fire slowly over to Emma, made the young girl’s heart melt. No matter how many times Emma saw the Queen, she was still overwhelmed by her beauty when she first saw her. Emma immediately wished she had a drink because she was nervous and wanted something to ease her awkwardness. Luckily Regina seemed to have read her mind as she asked, “would you like a drink? It will help you relax.”  
“Sure.” Emma said walking over to the Queen.  
“Not to worry Emma, magic is nothing to be afraid of.” Regina said poofing a drink into her other hand and giving it to Emma. “Only one this time though.” Emma nodded in agreeance.  
Something about the Queen seemed different this evening, Emma thought. Every other time they had met she seemed somewhat tired and especially last time when she seemed sick. But tonight she seemed confident and fierce which only made her more intimidating than she already was. Emma took a few sips of her drink and asked, “So what will I be learning first?”  
“Nothing too difficult. I first have to teach you the basics and what it takes to wield magic.” Regina said walking over to her vanity.   
“What if I can’t do it again? What if that was just a onetime thing?” Emma asks nervously.  
“Emma, if you have magic, you can use it. You just need to be trained.” Regina reassured her.  
Regina set down her drink and picked up a crystal off her vanity and held it in the palm of her hand. “Now, come over here. Your first lesson you will be to try and make this disappear from your hand and reappear onto the vanity, like so.” The crystal quickly disappeared from her hand and the next second was on the vanity. Regina picked it up again and took Emma’s drink and sat it down and then took her hand and placed the crystal in it.   
“So what am I supposed to do?” Emma asked.  
“Well, magic is fueled by emotion. So think of a time that made you angry, let the emotion fill you up and then picture the crystal on the vanity with all your might.” Regina explained.  
“Why anger? Can’t I think of something that made me happy?” Emma questions.  
“Emma. I am teaching you dark magic, which is all I know. You maybe the savior and naturally your magic would be light but since you have yet to use it, the magic can be persuaded either way.”   
“The savior?” Emma asks confused.   
“Yes. Have your parents failed to mention that to you?” Regina asks, not surprised.  
“They haven’t said anything. What do you mean I’m the savior?”  
“Well, 18 years ago when I was going to cast my curse, Rumpelstiltskin predicted that you would be the one to break my curse and bring back the happy endings. I thought since I didn’t cast my curse that would no longer make you the savior but apparently it wasn’t just my curse that would make you become a savior and reveal your magic.” Regina explains.  
“So that’s why I have magic?” She asks slowly still digesting what Regina had told her.   
“I suppose so.” Regina answers, glad she didn’t ask any further questions about why it was revealed the other night. “So Emma, are you ready to learn dark magic?”  
“Yes, I am. Okay so think of something that made me angry and imagine the crystal where I want it to go?” She asks looking herself in the mirror. “Why would my parents not tell me that?” Emma asks, now fixated on the savior deal.  
“I’m not sure Emma. I will never try to understand you parents.”  
“They are so over-protective and treat me like a child, I just…uh.” Emma states angrily.  
“Perfect. Now fuel that anger into making that crystal disappear.” Regina says with a grin.  
“Right.” Emma says and closes her eyes thinking about how angry her parents make her and then the spot on Regina’s vanity where she wanted to crystal to go. Emma thought hard but could still feel the crystal in her hand. After a minute she opened her eyes in frustration. “Why isn’t it working?” She asks angrily.  
Regina just giggles and says, “Don’t worry Emma. I didn’t expect you to get it right away. It’s going to take practice and dedication. Have patience.” Regina placed her hands on Emma shoulders and she shuddered at her touch. Any thought of anger and frustration left Emma’s mind as soon as Regina touched her. Regina could sense her nervousness and decided to mess with her little more. She turned Emma around and placed her hand under Emma’s chin. Emma’s eyes were wide open not knowing how to react. Regina inched her face closer to Emma’s and in a light voice said “I know you can do it Emma.” She dropped her hand back to Emma’s shoulder and turned her back to face the mirror. “Now try again.”   
Regina’s hand was still on her shoulders and something about her touch made Emma feel like she could do anything. She thought hard about the crystal and where she wanted it to go and in an instant she felt a lightness in her hand. She opened her eyes and saw the crystal was no longer in her hand. She squealed with joy and turned around and embraced Regina. “I did it!”   
Regina was not expecting Emma to hug her. The last time anyone had hugged her was when her father did right before she ripped his heart out. The thought brought tears to the Queen’s eyes. When Emma broke apart the hug she looked in Regina’s teary eyes and asked, “Are you alright Regina?”   
“I’m fine. It’s just…its nothing.” She blinked the tears away. “I’m so proud of you Emma. You are a quick learner.” She said with a wide smile.  
“You are a great teacher.” Emma said with an even wider smile and shyly swiveling her shoulders. Regina cleared her throat and reached for both of their appletinis and handed Emma’s to her.   
“A toast to your first of many successful magic lessons.” Regina said and clinked Emma’s glass. They both took a big celebratory gulp and gazed into each other’s eyes. Neither of them wanted to look away and neither of them did. There was a strange spark of energy inside both of them every time they touched or their eyes met. Emma touching Regina made her magic work the other night and the same had just happened in reverse. Neither were quite sure what it was but something about them being together felt right to the both of them.  
Regina finally broke the staring and turned around saying “that’s probably enough excitement for tonight. I’m very impressed Emma. I truly didn’t think you would get that tonight.”  
“Thank you.” Emma said and finished her drink and set it back on the vanity. “When should I come back?”  
“Oh…When would you like to come back?” Regina asks.  
“Every night,” Emma blurted out without thinking feeling the ‘say the first thing on your mind’ effect that alcohol has. Regina smiled and turned her face slightly so that Emma would not see her blushing.   
“Then I shall send a carriage for you, same time, tomorrow night.” The Queen said looking into the fire with a grin.   
“Thank you.” Emma said while walking to the door.   
“Emma wait.” Regina called out after her. Emma’s heart sank at the thought of all the possible things Regina would ask her to wait for. Regina walked over to her and took her hand. Then she poofed the crystal into her other hand and placed it in Emma’s. “Remember to practice.” She said cupping both hands around Emma’s. Regina let go but Emma’s hand remained in the same spot, frozen by the touch of Regina’s hands.   
She looks down at the crystal and says, “I will,” and departs Regina’s room.


End file.
